CONTENTS FEATURE: Said, proclaimed, retorted: the undertones of attributive verbs NEWS: EditPros turns 15 GRAMMAR COACH: Fielding your questions FINDER'S FEE: Recommend a friend—and earn up to $500 FEATURE: Said, proclaimed, retorted: don't overlook undertones of attributive verbs      "Say, mom, Gilbert said I could go to the county fair with his family, and his mom said I could have dinner at their house. And Lumpy is going along because his mom and dad said it's OK. So can I go, too?"      The persuasive power of arguments can be enhanced by attribution — the practice of including a supportive statement by a credible source. Children who cite the permission of parents of friends in making requests are making effective use of attribution. The idea is not the child's alone; Gilbert's mother endorsed it, and Lump's parents agreed.      Scientific research papers and other forms of scholarly writing consistently make use of attribution in the form of parenthetic "citations," footnotes or endnotes through which to credit the research or opinions of other scholars. In journalistic or narrative writing — such as that found in newsletters, anecdotal case studies or business correspondence — direct quotations or paraphrased summaries are used to indicate sources of information. Journalists rely primarily on the verb "say" for attribution because of its neutrality. It is neither accusatory nor descriptive; it does not express whether a statement was made in anger, in surprise, in sadness or in jest. It is colorless.      You can credit statements using numerous other verbs, but many of them require caution. If you choose a verb hastily, your intended attribution might be unintentionally accusatory, or sound like it was delivered by smart-aleck Eddie Haskell rather than by nice-guy Ward Cleaver.      Consider how the undertones of four disparate attributive verbs affect this quotation: "One other person has a key to the storage room," Claudia said. "One other person has a key to the storage room," Claudia hinted. "One other person has a key to the storage room," Claudia admitted. "One other person has a key to the storage room," Claudia retorted.      Take a look at this list of attributive verbs, and their implications. 12 NEUTRAL ATTRIBUTIVE VERBS announce: declare publicly answer: respond to a question ask: pose a question comment: explain, interpret or criticize; make an observation or remark expressing an opinion or attitude continue: maintain or persist; useful when breaking a long quote by an individual into two or more paragraphs observe: mention casually; remark remark: casually express an observation or comment reply: answer a question report: give an impartial, accurate account of proceedings or events respond: answer a question say: utter aloud; express in words state: declare or report; usually used in connection with formal statements 38 JUDGMENTAL VERBS OF ATTRIBUTION acknowledge: admit that something exists or is true; reluctantly disclose agreement or knowledge about something that might have been concealed add: say further; can indicate that a quotation one individual amplifies or reinforces a statement that someone else made previously (example: "That's not the only reason," Carlson added); also applicable when breaking a long quote by an individual into two or more paragraphs admit: acknowledge; implies reluctance to disclose, grant or concede information affirm: validate with firmness or deep conviction allege: assert or declare to be true, especially without proof or before proof has been determined; make a statement in support or denial of a claim or accusation assert: affirm, typically forcefully or aggressively and in anticipation of denial or objection assure: state confidently to remove doubt; reassure avow: declare boldly, bluntly or assuredly claim: assert, typically in the context of likely disagreement or controversy concede: admit or acknowledge grudgingly or hesitantly conclude: reach a decision, based either on logical reasoning, or on an inference from evidence confess: admit; implies a damaging admission — of a weakness, failure, omission or guilt confirm: verify or establish validity, either through an authoritative statement or indisputable fact; often used in connection with acknowledgement of a contention or allegation contend: assert or maintain; suggests an argumentative or contentious response counter: respond in opposition; disagree assertively declare: state formally, officially, emphatically or explicitly demand: request or call for with authority, urgency, insistence or arrogance disclose: expose; reveal something that previously had been concealed divulge: reveal a secret, which may imply a breach of confidence explain: define, justify or clarify information that is not immediately obvious or entirely known hint: convey indirectly and by allusion rather than explicitly; can indicate coyness or slyness implore: beseech; call or pray for with passion, desperation or distress imply: express indirectly; suggests a covert or veiled statement insinuate: introduce an idea or accusation gradually or in a subtle, indirect or covert way insist: maintain persistently or emphatically intimate: hint; communicate delicately and indirectly joke: jest or tease; express comically, facetiously or with a lack of seriousness maintain: assert or affirm, perhaps insistently mention: refer to casually or incidentally, possibly as an afterthought note: mention or remark about, perhaps off-handedly point out: direct attention to, with the implication that the statement is an undisputed fact proclaim: declare solemnly, officially or formally; can convey insistence, pride or defiance question: implies interrogation — careful and continuous asking reason: persuade by the use of reason; typically used in justifying a position, or refuting someone else's assertion rejoin: respond sharply or critically retort: answer quickly through a counter-argument, perhaps sarcastically or caustically scoff: show contempt through derision or mockery suggest: make evident indirectly; mention or imply as a possibility 17 VERBS THAT DESCRIBE VOCAL INFLECTION bark: command loudly, curtly or angrily beg: insistently plead; implies humility or desperation bellow: shout in a deep voice; roar overpoweringly cry: weep, shriek, shout or otherwise express with anguish drawl: speak in a dialect with prolonged vowels, typical of southerners and Texans emphasize: stress, perhaps with vocal inflection exclaim: speak loudly or vehemently; express forcefully, emotionally and perhaps defensively mumble: speak inarticulately or inaudibly mutter: speak in a low, indistinct voice, perhaps in an angry or sullen tone plead: entreat; offer an apology or excuse roar: express loudly, perhaps in rage, distress or excitement scold: angrily or harshly express contempt or disapproval; rebuke shout: make a loud cry or call shriek: cry out frantically in a piercing or shrill voice wail: express dissatisfaction plaintively; lament whisper: speak softly, almost inaudibly, to maintain secrecy yell: utter a loud cry, scream or shout PAST OR PRESENT TENSE?      Under most circumstances, place an attributive verb in past tense if it introduces a statement that an individual made at a particular time or event. Here's an example: "Kalamazoo is the model of innovation for the state of Michigan and is in a great position to help catapult Michigan's economy," said Bobby Hopewell, who was elected mayor in November. The mayor made that statement as part of his state of the city address. The event took place in the past, so past tense — "said" — is appropriate.      Present tense is commonly used, however, in photo captions like this one: Retiring Community Care Havelock coordinator Pat Greer hands her office keys to new coordinator Tammy Ross this week in Havelock. The accompanying photo froze the moment in time, reflected by present tense in the caption.      Some magazine editors prefer present tense throughout articles as a means of imparting a heightened sense of immediacy. Present tense is appropriate when citing a statement that an individual makes repeatedly or habitually — for example: "That'll kick it up a notch," as TV chef Emeril Legasse says.      Present tense appears forced and odd, however, in reference to a statement that clearly was made once, in the past. Here's an example from the body of a business magazine article: "I won't hire anyone who hasn't been beat up and put in the ditch," Thomas says during an interview. The sentence clearly stipulates that the quoted source made the statement at a particular time in the past; any tense other than past — "said" — is illogical in that context.      Even Gilbert's mom would agree with that. NEWS: EditPros turns 15      EditPros LLC is now 15 years old. We opened EditPros as a home-based business in July 1993, and established the www.editpros.com Web site three years later. In 1998 we moved into an office building in downtown Davis, where we remain.      During the past 15 years we have worked on innumerable writing, editing and proofreading projects, including newsletters, scientific research studies, annual reports, Web site content, sales brochures, course catalogs, case studies, biographical and corporate profiles, and other materials. The subject matter with which we have worked encompasses agriculture, health care, real estate development, food products, higher education programs, civil engineering, urban development, veterinary medicine, environmental sustainability, real estate development, entomology, physical therapy and other disciplines.      To our clients: we are grateful to you for trusting in us and relying upon us throughout the years, and we look forward to serving you for many more years. Thank you. GRAMMAR COACH: Fielding your questions 1. Olivia K. wrote:      "A few times in your article [EditPros News, May 2008], you write 'The article said...' and 'An obituary about a musician said....' Shouldn't both of those be 'read'?" The grammar coach replies:      Not necessarily, Olivia. In Webster's Online Dictionary, the first definition for the transitive verb "say" is "to express in words; to state." That definition does not restrict the meaning to spoken communication. The dictionary defines the verb "state" as "to express the particulars of, especially in words; report." Once again, no reference is made to the method of communication.      The American Heritage Dictionary validates that meaning of "say" (along with the sense of uttering something aloud), and amplifies it with another definition: "To give nonverbal expression to; signify or embody." The dictionary cites an example: It was an act that said "devotion."      Webster's New World College Dictionary reaffirms the American Heritage Dictionary definitions of "say," and adds others: "to indicate or show" (with the example the clock says ten); "to communicate an idea or feeling" (with the example a painting that says nothing).      The Cambridge Dictionary of American English further defines the verb "say" in the general sense of giving information or instructions. It cites this example: What does that sign say?      The verb "read" has far more definitions than the verb "say"; most involve the act of reading printed matter rather than attribution. In the sense of quoting written content, the American Heritage Dictionary defines the intransitive sense of the verb "read" thusly: "To have a particular wording: Recite the poem exactly as it reads. To contain a specific meaning: As the law reads, the defendant is guilty."      In Webster's New World Dictionary, you have to bypass 15 transitive verb definitions and five intransitive verb definitions for the verb "read" before reaching the one that relates to quotation: "to contain, or be drawn up in, certain words" (example: the sentence reads as follows).      The dictionaries verify that either the verb "say" or "read" can be used to introduce quoted or paraphrased written passages.      You also can use the verb "wrote," as in, Colonial revolutionary and American statesman John Adams, the nation's second president, wrote, "the very definition of a republic is 'an empire of laws and not of men.'" 2. Karen B. wrote:      "My company name ends in "s" — Sweet Pea Designs. When using the phrase Sweet Pea Designs products, I have not made this possessive. Is this correct? I know that if I was using it as a possessive, I would need to write Sweet Pea Designs's. Right?" The grammar coach replies:      Well, yes. Or possibly no. The bad news is that guidelines governing the formation of possessive forms of proper names ending in "s" such as "Sweet Pea Designs" are complex — and conflicting. The good news is that you can circumvent them.      First, here are the rules by the book — or rather, books. The two most prominent guides — The Chicago Manual of Style and the Associated Press (AP) Stylebook — weigh in differently on the subject.      AP (which is applicable for newsletters and news releases) endorses adding only an apostrophe (thus, your company's merchandise would be shown as "Sweet Pea Designs' products."      In contrast, the Chicago stylebook recommends addition of an apostrophe and an "s". For you, that translates to "Sweet Pea Designs's products."      You can evade the dilemma in either of two ways: use the preposition "of" to indicate possession (as in, "the products of Sweet Pea Designs are...") use your company name adjectivally (as in, " the newest Sweet Pea Designs products are...").      Are you perplexed by some aspect of grammar or word usage? Don't be shy! Ask the "grammar coach" at EditPros and we'll try to help—at no charge, just for the sport of it. FINDER'S FEE: Recommend a friend—and earn a finder's fee of up to $500      Do you know of a friend or colleague whose office can benefit from EditPros' services? If you do, EditPros may reward you with a "finder's fee" of up to $500.      EditPros LLC, established in 1993, performs writing, editing, proofreading and publication management services for newsletters, brochures, Web sites, annual reports, research studies, business proposals, and other informational and marketing materials. Our office is in Davis, Calif., between Sacramento and San Francisco; however, our clients include educational institutions, private corporations, health-care organizations, trade associations, scientific research institutions, Web site developers and government agencies from throughout the United States. We have worked with some of them for more than 10 years.      If you recommend our services to a friend or business colleague, and that introduction leads to an assignment for EditPros, we will award you a "finder's fee" equaling 10 percent of the amount we earn on the first assignment for the new client, up to a maximum finder's fee of $500. Naturally, the finder's fee is applicable only to client organizations for which we have not worked previously.      This offer will remain in effect until further notice. 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